A Chaste Gay Man at 47

Well, I haven't written to the blog in a while because of the completely disappointing outcome with the CS-100.  After a bit of study, I easily freed myself from the device.  The only disappointment greater than my own was that of Master.  It is completely uncertain if these chastity manufacturers even try these things on more than one person before they say "it's inescapable".  About the only way the CB-3000 and CS-100 are inescapable is if you simply desire not to escape.  Both devices, on their own, are so bad that one can not only escape, but put themselves right back in the device, keyholder never to be the wiser.  What is the purpose of that.

So, a few days ago I decided to build a better mousetrap.  But instead of reinventing the chastity belt, I decided to modify the CS-100.  Well, we tried a number of things involving leg straps to tighten the belt around the groin area.  See, the problem with the CS-100 is the ease in which one can suck in their stomach and remove their penis from the tube.  It takes all of 5 seconds to free yourself.  Granted, you can't remove the belt, but you can turn yourself loose enough to be able to masturbate or even receive a blow job.  Hell, you might even be able to fuck.

So the issue we face was how to keep ones penis in the tube.  We thought about the PA method, but that required that this slave put a hole in his penis just for chastity's sake and that he have some sort of lock through the end of his penis.  This was unacceptable.  Besides the pain and irritation of getting a PA, I simply had decided against one a while back.  Fortunately Master agreed. <whew, dogged a bullet there>

After looking at several penis traps on the net and some home made modifications others have done, we settled on taking a very stiff wire, attaching it between the lock and the belt (so one couldn't get it off without the key to the belt) and somehow attaching the other end of the wire to the head of the penis.  The first thing we came up with (coat hanger based rod) actually worked.  It held the penis firmly in place inside the device.  The problem came hours later when the head was getting pinched in the hand made ring 

Posted by GayNLocked on April 15, 2008 23:09:23 | Permalink | Comments

It seems to have only taken about four months, but this slave is finally locked up tight in his chastity belt.  With a few modifications, the cs-100 is performing as it should, giving my Master total control over my penis.

The interesting thing about chastity is that aside from the slave heart, which my Master agrees this slave certainly has, is that slavery is not as potent and real feeling to me unless something is forfieted.  Many slaves may forfift their body for pain, well, this slave isn't a pain pig.  The use of chastity, both as pleasure and punishment brings new meaning to slavery for me.  There is no doubt that my Master sees this in his slave.  Ever since being locked, without all of the worries and pains of fitting and modifications, this boy has wanted nothing more than to serve his Master.  The knowledge that He is in control, that He may use it for his pleasure, for my punishment, for his joy and for my frustration gives new meaning to what serving Him is all about.

I have gone without even a calpers firing for two weeks now.  My boy penis gets hard inside the tube just thinking of His meaty cock in my ass or down my throat.  That my pleasure must come from the milking of my prostate and not from penis stimulation or else there is no release.  He truely is in control now.

Another interesting thing ocurred today in school.  A relatively new acquiantance was sitting with his laptop open and he had the BDSM flag displayed as the background on his screen.  While i am aware that he is straight, and he has seen my collar before today, i am now fairly aware that he knows that i am property of my Master.  It is pretty certain he would not have put that flag on his desktop had he not known my status as a slave.  So, while we haven't discussed anything about my role yet, it should make for an interesting year in school.  We'll see how that plays out

Time to make the home ready for my Master's arrival.  Cheers!

Posted by GayNLocked on January 29, 2008 19:24:49 | Permalink | Comments

All the experimentation has left me sore again, but W/we now have a "final solution". After getting some plastic-coated 3/16" wire looped to go between the scrotum bar and the middle of the back of the belt, slave found after a few days of wear that it was really causing pain. Master's inspection of where the device was rubbing revealed some broken skin at the apex of the crack where the small diameter wire was rubbing the skin raw. Yesterday, slave went back to the hardware store and picked up some 1/2" outside diameter tubing and pushed the wires through it in an effort to increase the size of the tubing to avoid causing a cutting effect when pulled tightly. It seems to have worked just fine. The only problem is that slave now has a bit of a raw spot that needs to be treated before he can wear the device again on a full time basis. The solution makes for a interesting time deffecating, however, slave can pull the tube far enough away from his ass to actually avoid the issue. It is truely amazing the things one must do to be chaste properly now days.

School is going well, got in the mid-90s in slave's first class. It's a good thing too, as slave is hardly doubtful at the displeasure Master would show if he did not get good grades since there is a significant sacrifice being made by Master for His slave to be in school. slave truely hopes that W/we are over the hump on this chastity device issue. W/we have been working on a solution now since September of 2007. By the way, if anyone else is looking at chastity as a part of their day-to-day life, let this slave be the first to tell you that it comes with its share of pain and discomfort! Especially in the fittting and "getting used to it" phases.

As soon as Master digs out His camera and takes some more pictures, W/we will post them here.

Posted by GayNLocked on January 26, 2008 15:01:00 | Permalink | Comments

This blog has a few avid readers. Considering the last entry, i am certain that many of them think i have stopped writing and have gone on to do other things. But the changes that have been made in my life most recently have drawn me away from writing only temporarily. I have entered an accellerated acredidation school to earn an Associates Degree in 15 months. This requires 5 hours of classroom per day, 3+ hours of studying and after adequate sleep and taking care of my Master, there is very little time. But i will stive to do better now that we have a new chastity device.

Master and i ordered a new chastity device on November 27th. W/we ordered the CS-100 from Chastity Steel, http://www.chastitysteel.de/. The device was shipped on December 10, 2007 and arrived at O/our home on January 12, 2008. Yes, the shipping from Germany to the United States sucks!

A few days of wearing, sizing and figiting with it all proved that the device was much more comfortable than the CS-3000, but was it secure? Hell no! As of yesterday morning i had to have been the single most frustrated slave. The device was a complete flop as i could remove it at will within a few seconds and be happily stroking away when left unattended.

Have faith! Last night, the diligence of my Master paid off. Of course, i should add here that this is why i desired Him to be my Master as he is truely a guilding force in my life, but i digress. With little more than $5.00 W/we were able to fabricate a steel wire harness around the buttocks that connected the base of the belt (the portion under the scrotum) to the back of the belt around my waist. After a bit of tugging and clawing, i believe we have finally achieved a device (under $800 USD) that will keep this slave away from his penis. Here is a picture of me in the device.

All problems aside, today may quite honestly be the first day of my slavery where Master does have complete and total control over my pleasure. The belt is inescapable short of taking an blow tourch to it, and that close to my skin is not an option! I suspect now we can get back to having entries on this blog discussing what i had originally intended. What chastity is like when someone else is in complete control of it and what a wonderful life a slave can have in service to his Master.

Posted by GayNLocked on January 21, 2008 13:48:00 | Permalink | Comments

Well, as a slave i certainly can understand discomfort and pain, but this CB-3000 is about to get the best of me.  i certainly hope that AL Enterprises doesn't expect me to be an advocate for their product, it simply sucks.  So, as of yesterday, my Master had me order the CS-100 from Chastity Steel.

While i don't expect a chastity device to be comfortable, the CB-3000 has caused sores and pinching on my penis and areas around it, in many cases, sores that bled.  This slave understands discomfort, but pain and maming by a device is unacceptable.  Thank goodness, my Master agrees. 

So the long and the short of it is that this slave should be in his new CS-100 sometime around Christmas day this year.  I'll keep you posted.

Posted by GayNLocked on November 28, 2007 17:00:26 | Permalink | Comments

Master probably would not agree with the title of this section, but it now being a little under 3 hours since O/our scene this morning, this slave could only describe the scene as a good beating.  Being new to the BDSM side of M/s relationships, slave begged his Master a few nights ago to whip him, not for punishment or correction, but for a mix of pain and pleasure.  In reading about all of the spritual and psychological events others were getting from a good flogging, slave was naturally curious. 

slave has never enjoyed getting spanked.  It is probably due to this that Master has been able to very successfully alter slave's behaviour with mearly the threat of a spanking (and some rather limited spanking correction too).  But this was to experience a different realm of pain.  To mix pain with pleasure and to see if there is something this slave is missing that would add to his fulfilment and give his Master the sadistic outlet that He desires.

After some intense play this morning (Master loves to tease His slave mercilessly), He asked if slave was ready to experience the pain/pleasure threshold for the first time. slave was curious enough to consent and Master tied him spread eagle to the bed with his ass up in the air, and put a ball gag in his mouth. slave trusts his Master in all things, but to say the least, this slave was apprehensive.

Master began by lightly flogging slave with a rope, every once in a while allowing it to land with a little more force, then backing off. After a few minutes, He switched to a hair brush which He would titilate the skin by rubbing the bristle side over a spot, turn it over, tap, rub, tap and spank.  Over the course of the next 15-20 minutes He began to intensify the spanking reaching a point where this slave was crying out as He continued. slave didn't end up crying, as he thought he might before it all started, but neither did slave find any real pleasure in the midst of the pain. This slave was spanked, hard. slave's ass has mild bruising where blood vessels were broken in the process.

After the beating, slave just lay on the bed, quietly as his Master removed his gag and untied him from the bed. slave was trying to reconcile what he felt, trying to look inside for a pleasure in this pain. slave doesn't believe he found any. While he doesn't really know what he is looking for in a catharsis brought on due to the pain, it didn't happen.  All he ended up with is rather sore, blistered cheeks.  In the coming days, slave may have to edit this entry as feelings come to him over what transpired. Maybe further exploration is required, however, if the pain must be intensifed to reach a catharsis beyond that felt today, it may never be able to happen.  slave felt he was truely at his pain threshold.

Notice, these feelings that this slave is looking for do not involve my Master.  He was the instrument of delivery, but this isn't about Him. This isn't about what He did to his slave.  He did not do any wrong.  slave is simply trying to find his connection in the realm of BDSM, and quite honestly, there may not be one for this slave.

Posted by GayNLocked on November 13, 2007 19:05:00 | Permalink | Comments

One of the more difficult things a slave has to wrap their arms around is the obliterration of the individual. As a slave, you are no longer thinking of what "i" might like or how "i" view a situation.  my Master has said over and over that W/we view things "filtered through a gay mind", meaning our perceptions and realities are based on our gay interpretation.  Each day of slavery brings one closer to becoming one in thought with his Master. It is fair and i certainly admit that there are thoughts that still cross my mind about what i would like or what i should do. They have, however, become more and more tempered with, whether or not my Master would derive pleasure from it or not.

For instance, chastity was originally my choice. Orgasm denial was influenced by conversations with my Master, but ultimately those choices i made were based on what i felt my Master would desire.  In recent times, my Master had me taking care of household needs and it was quite taxing on this slave's time. While Master thought certain things could be done in a certain time period, i actually took longer and therefore it eliminated what little precious time i had to relax while my Master was away.  Discussion with my Master about how taxing this was brought about some change that i liked, but, i feel that i have cheeted my Master and in this issue taken some control back.  The first two choices on chastity and orgasm denial, i could easily say to myself, "well, Master would approve", and He did. He has affirmed that through this experience He would never own a slave without chastity again. But getting Master to lighten slave's domestic work load, how could that be pleasing?  How could that be filtered through a slave's mind?  How is that not reasserting control?

This slave rests on one principle which helps me think through these things. It is no doubt that a productive slave is a happy slave.  Credence must be given to a slave's need for down time. In discussing this issue with my Master, i clearly informed Him of the preceived problem and i clearly stated that if it was Master's desire that His slave be this busy, without down time, that it would be so and this slave would understand.  This isn't individuality in the slave, it is quite the opposite.  It clearly tells one's Master that His will be done. That it is quite possible that the slave doesn't see the whole picture of what Master is trying to do in training.  Clearly, in this case, my Master found that it might have been more taxing than necissary and reduced the work load.  But ultimately, He made the decision.

W/we are now working with language to help this slave reach a point where in communication, individualism is set aside. You will see reference in this document to "i", well, for telling the story, maybe it's easier. But all in all, "i", "me", and "my" will begin to take a back seat to further remove the individual and focus stronger on the "W/we" and "U/us" in this relationship.

Being either Master or slave is not an easy task in a 24/7 M/s relationship. Both are constantly at work and communicating. i had the chance to speak with someone yesterday in a chat on-line about slavery. He was unsure in a lot of ways, but he seemed like he a slave heart.  This slave felt almost sorry, not that this person had anything wrong, but that he had not found his Master yet.  This slave was Masterless for a long time, it is a painful life that has very little enjoyment and fulfillment.  Finding a 24/7 Master is a monumental task.  This slave knows.

Posted by GayNLocked on October 28, 2007 23:34:36 | Permalink | Comments

On of the fundamental differences I believe in a M/s relationship and a D/s one is the hightened protocol required of the submissive or slave. Master and i have established a number of rules that i must follow and we put them in writing in what is titled the slave Protocol Manual.  As a slave in the service of my Master, i have a number of charges and they are listed as basic understandings, social, low, home and high protocols. 

The basic understadings are things that I am to do at all times, no matter the venue or time of day.  An example would be; slave shall always put the needs of his Master above his own. Failure to follow the basic understandings are met with rather severe punishment, or at least this slave thinks so. A basic understanding are things which show respect to Master and constantly remind both Master and slave of their respective positions in this relationship. The punishment for infractions of the basic understandings is a spanking. The device is the back of a hair brush and i will receive six swats across each buttock.  Let me tell you, this is not a "love tap".  There is no sexual prelude, no carressing and building of any euphoric state.  i do however have to confess that the result is rather amazing, my attitude is changed. i don't like the punishment and it doesn't make my boi penis hard.

The protocols outside of the basic understandings are things i must do during certain times or veneus and they build on each other.  The high protocol is a combination of the social, low, and home protocols along with specific things that are required while in high protocol.  An example of a high protocol item is; slave shall kneel when Master enters the room in which the slave is present.  These are rigidly formal protocols, things expacted when in formal settings. It is Master's responsibility to inform His slave of what protocol applies and when. A very common high protocol item for slaves is; slave shall not sit on the firniture.  It is quite expected and usual that slaves curl up at the feet of their Masters in social settings.

The home protocol is applicable, generally, when W/we are both at home or routinely when Master is present in the home. An example of a home protocol is; slave shall stand to eat all his meals unless specifically invited to sit by his Master.  The standing to eat protocol means that i am to remain attentive to Master's dining needs without all the fuss of having to get up from the table and attend to Him.  It also has a little bit of that high protocol feeling of not sitting on the furniture, even though it doesn't say anything about other chairs, couches and the such in the house during the time W/we are on home protocol.

The low protocol is semi-casual. i would say this best describes the interation when in restaurants and the such.  A good example of a low protocol item would be; slave shall not sit until his Master has been seated.  In the higher protocol, i would stand to eat as to attend my Master. In a restaurant venue, this is unnecessary and as i'm sure, unwanted by the staff of the restaurant. So the low protocol makes it look very much like another regular couple dining out, with the exception that W/we know better.

The social protocol is for venues such as a bar or in a public arena. An example of a social protocol woudl be; slave shall open all doors for his Master always allowing him to pass through the doorway first.  Simple, elegant, but very respectful of ones place when accompanying his Master in public.

The punishment for protocol violations can vary widely. If the action on my part is deemed by Master to be intentional or disrespectful, it could carry the severe spanking punishment of the violation of the basic understandings, however, usually, and Master knows i truly respect the protocols and my place in them, it carries much lighter punishments such as sexual play denial where i am left in my chastity device and not played with for a day, a few days or longer. Master has been very fair on the application of punishment.  i still wake up evrey day and thank him for collaring me and chosing me to serve his daily needs.  It is truly my pleasure.

Posted by GayNLocked on October 22, 2007 18:50:53 | Permalink | Comments

i must admit, i never expected chastity to be comfortable. There is a reason, its very difficult to put something around your genitals and keep it there securly away from the prying hands of the genitalia's owner. However, i have found this to be quite trying.  The problem is security. When the unit is on and with the right size ring and spacers to keep my penis trapped, the ring is too tight and blood flow is disrupted causing a very painful burning experience. When the ring is sized one up, security is compromised as i can pull my penis from the back of the unit.  So i ordered the Keep Sake Device Generation 2, aka KSD-G2. Putting the largest of the KSD devices on still caused blood flow restrictions in the larger ring.  Secure, yes, painful, yes.  Based on the instructions, i sanded away some of the plastic (enlarging the hole in the device) and now, because of all the days of pain, had to wait nearly 2 days to even be able to put the unit back on.

Well now we're back in and on day two.  It is not comfortable and in tight clothes it is quite uncomfortable, but it works.  Since my contract with Master requires 24/7 chastity, i don't have a lot of options so we'll just wait, watch, feel and pray that this won't continue to be a fuss. What is interesting is that my mind is totally around chastity now.  The absence of the device makes me feel uncomfortable and unsure.  i explained to Master the other day that the chastity device makes me feel safe, and it does. 

On October 17, 2007 Master and i completed our Lifestyle Contract and slave Protocol Manual.  The contract was dated October 17, 2007 and is to run for a full year. Interestingly, i negotiated nothing for myself, i have turned over all assets and every part of me to my Master.  i have given Him the power to make all decisons, no matter how important or trivial. i will serve Him, it is the greatest gift i have to give Him. i am a complete slave and i have never felt freer, happier or more complete in my life.

Posted by GayNLocked on October 20, 2007 22:51:55 | Permalink | Comments

Thirty-two days ago, my Master put my boi penis in a CB-3000.  With the exception of cleaning and some play, i have not had an orgasm in over a month. Today, my Master is going to allow me to have a complete ball-emptying orgasm and i am, most definately, very excited.  Don't get me wrong, i do enjoy holding back the orgasm and keeping my essence inside me as i am able to beter serve under those conditions, but every now and again, even my Master believes an orgasm for his slave is in order.

i am writing this before my Master frees me to have an orgasm and i don't really know if i will write anything about it afterwards. Somtetimes some feelings don't really need to come out in writing.  But i do know this, as i have never volunteered nor been forced to obstain from an orgasm for this long since i figured out what my boi penis was for, i am expecting a real display of fireworks.  Master has assured me that i will be edged  mercilously prior to the climax.

An interesting note, if you've been following the blog, i am not allowed to touch my boi penis, so Master will be the one edging me and making me cum. Since i have been serving him and his cock throughout this, my first, chastity period, i am excited about Master playing with me. i did beg Master to allow me to touch and play with myself, but He has denied that request as completely uneccessary and i have been forced to agree.

What happens after? Well, interestingly, i will be making a modification to the CB-3000 to close the vent holes in the top of the device.  Master has been having to put tape on the inside to block the holes because my boi penis skin comes through, especially during arousal, and the lock can scrape across and do some hefty damage.  So, i will seal the holes with some silicon sealer and see if that will hold during the next lock up period.

Since we have moved into a M/s relationship, the contract between myself and Master has been modified.  Extensibly to get rid of the "draw a card" to determine my time to next orgasm.  The new contract allows for Master to simply decide how long the period will be. It is my sincere hope that He sees fit to keep it under a week as i have kind of missed my orgasms.  But, alas, this slave has no choice and will accept his Master's will.  

:: Update :: The play was truly fantastic. Master bound me spread eagle on the bed and brought me to seven edges with minimal fluid release. On the eighth, everything was so full of fluid that it simply began to flow, but fortunately i was able to hold back a full orgasm.  Master then began the ninth edging, as a reach the pinnacle and asked Him to stop he refused.  i must confess, i have never experienced such a powerful release. Interestingly, the flow was just dribbles of seamen but the hip thrusts and internal firing was so powerful, a power i had never experienced. By far and away, this was the best orgasm i had ever experienced.

Posted by GayNLocked on October 14, 2007 17:41:00 | Permalink | Comments

Today i have a new term for my Keyholder. W/we started out in a D/s relationship and i found that i simply could not let it rest at that level.  As of a now, He is my Master and i am His slave boi. It is impossible for me to say in words how complete i now feel. That i fianally have a place where i can truly show Him how precious He is to me. To shower on HIm the adoration and completely turning over my entire being, not just my boi penis to His control. Every part of my body and mind are ready to serve Him to His pleasure.

I have comitted to being my Master's property. He and He alone owns me. He desides what is best for His boi and He protects me from harm.  For His needs, sexual or otherwise, i am His servant, always ready and willing to provide for His every desire. It is through this that i have learned i derive the most pleasure.

This boi will require training and my Master is all too keenly aware of my shortcomings. He will instill in me discipline which will include continued control of my boi penis through chastity.  The boi realizes his penis is unruly and unpredictable, that without chastity he would masturbate leading to unpredictable motivation, mood swings and poor performance in training.  The ideal slave is a boi with bollocks fully charged with spunk and a Yes Sir! attitude. i will endeavour to be such a boi.

So how did W/we get here? The simple fact is that i am not sure W/we weren't already here, W/we just didn't want to call it what it plainly was. There was a keen desire for many years to turn over control of my being to a Master, i simply had not found myself in a position to become a slave boi because of a number of reasons.  It is very clear to me that my Master is a loving and deeply dedicated Man. He has indicated in words and action that this boi is precious to Him.  It is simply that He and i finally realized that this was, in fact, a true M/s relationship and W/we stepped into it without issue.

So as W/we enter this next phase of O/our commitment, i look forward to adding to this record, the changes surrounding A Chaste Gay Boi at 47.

Posted by GayNLocked on October 11, 2007 00:57:18 | Permalink | Comments

We have just returned from a wonderful three days in, of all places, Dewy Rose, Georgia.  The Rivers Edge is a gay oriented, clothing optional campground and resort in the middle of nowhere.  Niether my keyholder nor I had ever been to a gay oriented campground, and I certainly had no previous experience with clothing optional places other than the occassional nude beach throughout the world.  From the moment we arrived on Wednesday we both started to feel the stresses of life and the outside world ebb away to be replaced with solitude and the enjoyment of just being in each others' company in the natural surroundings of the countryside.

I'd say it took us about an hour to familiarize ourselves with the camp.  We had rented a loft for the two nights which consisted of a small cabin with a kitchenette downstairs and a bed upstairs.  After the short familiarization period my clothes came off, almost never to return to my body during the entire stay.  What freedom! The being naked part was pretty good, but oh my, the CB-3000 could dangle out there without having to cram it sideways into tight jeans or fidgget with it under lighter attire.  This was the first time me and my chastity were going to be openly visible to the general public and while apprehensive, I jumped right into it.

The first passer-by came when we were returning from a walk, still familiarizing ourselves with the surroundings.  The gentleman was older than myself and my keyholder, but I was absolutely giddy when, as he passed by, the only thing he could do was stare at the device enclosing my cock.  The visit to the campground had only just begun, but I had exposed my lifestyle to a total stranger and I was beside myself.

I would say that the CB-3000 was the talk of the campground over the next few days. However, it probably also had something to do with our woodland sexual activities that drew folks into conversation. Wednesday was the day I completed my first 8-day run.  My keyholder set my cock free from the device, while my hands were bound and began to insert my cock into his ass.  He told me that I was allowed to have a wild orgasm so long as I did it fucking him.  Well, I love to fuck my keyholder; it gives me great pleasure to give him such pleasure. However, he is well aware that my ability to orgasm, standing up, hands bound, outside in a new environment, and fucking him was probably not going to be very easy, and boy was he right.  As charged as I was, I was unable to attain the bliss before we stopped.  My keyholder granted me the pleasure of getting to the edge of an orgasm before he locked me back in the CB-3000.

I was now to draw a card from the deck of cards and begin immediately serving my next lock up period, without complaint.  I drew a 10!  I was told I would be let out of the device on Tuesday, October 9th for a cleaning only and would be freed to have a chance at another conventional orgasm on  Saturday, October 13, 2007.

Several people at the resort did confront me and/or my keyholder regarding the chastity device. Talking about our lifestyle with others made it become more real to both of us.  Our ability to discuss it intelligently and confidently truly indicated to me that we are clear on the path we have chosen to live our lives together and that we are doing what is best for "us".  

The rest of our visit to Rivers Edge included a number of play sessions where my keyholder massaged my prostate and attempted to milk me while in the device. As I probably said earlier, prostate milkings without anyone touching my cock is one of the goals we are trying to achieve during this three month contract.  Once we successfully achieve that, I'm sure he will bind my cock in this device for much longer periods without traditional orgasms.

So the visit to the camp was, to say the least, an overwhelming success.  We certainly drew closer and our lifestyle has become a more ingrained part of our social being--both individually and as a couple.  We met some wonderful people, all of whom I hope we see again.  But most of all, I fell deeper in love with my Man, I cherish him more, love him stronger, and live even happier to serve him.  He is my Dominant, my Keyholder, my Lover, my Partner, and my Friend.

Posted by GayNLocked on October 06, 2007 16:58:00 | Permalink | Comments

When I first decided to be chaste and doing research about chastity and reading what others who were participating in this lifestyle were saying, I found it extremely difficult to believe that anyone in their right mind would desire to be chaste for months or year(s) at a time.  I still probably can't go there with the thought of no regular orgasm for a year or longer, but I have been talking with my lover and keyholder about a one to three month run at a time without being removed from the device.

I spent a considerable part of the day yesterday thinking about a long term lock up and the simple thought that kept running through my mind was that I couldn't for the life of me define why I wanted to do this.  No, I'm not a masochist, and yes, I became chaste because I played with myself too much taking away some of the pleasure of my partner.  But requiring my partner to face three months without the enjoyment of my cock might actually be cruel to him and I'm wondering if maybe I'm being a little selfish. So I am battling with the "why" of the extended lock up. 

I spoke with my partner/keyholder today about extended lock up periods. As his submissive, he was very clear on the point that he was in control of the device and my chastity would be as a direct result of his wishes and that I should simply put the thoughts aside and focus on my service to him.  While the longer term lock up does cause me to pause, he is right, I don't get a choice in this and I gave him the key because he does know what is best.

On a side note, my lover/keyholder is taking me to River's Edge camp tomorrow and we're going to be there up until the start of Octo-Bear-fest, a couple of days from now.  We had discussed bear camps on many occassions and since neither of us have ever been to one, I'm very apprehensive, yet intrigued by the trip.  When I get back I'll post a bit on my experiences while there.

Posted by GayNLocked on October 03, 2007 15:39:00 | Permalink | Comments

This is me sporting my CB-3000 on 5th day of first lock up, 30 September 2007.  My keyholder left town this morning on a business trip. Not only is this only the fifth day of my first lock up, but also my first day where my keyholder is not even in the same State.  I would find it erotic, only I have an overwhelming urge to play and I simply cannot.  I guess the one great thing is, he will be back tomorrow, but that doesn't mean much as I still have three more days in this lock up cycle before I can be freed.

Posted by GayNLocked on October 01, 2007 00:37:00 | Permalink | Comments

On the 25th day of Septeber 2007, my keyholder and I entered into a three month contract defining the terms and conditions of my lock up.  I was truly excited.  I had finally turned over control of my sexual appitite to my keyholder and he was to determine when and if I was to have an orgasm. 

The lock up period between standard (or traditional) orgasms is determined with a standard deck of cards.  The numbered cards 2-9 represent directly the number of days; the 10s and face cards represent 10 days and the ace represents 15 days.  My keyholder shuffles the cards and I get to draw the card that will determine how many days I remain chase before I am given an opportunity to have an orgasm.  During the entire three month period, I am denied access to my cock, meaning I will not be allowed to touch it, much less masturbate during the entire contract.  There are other stipulations for punishment if I break or alter the device to allow access to myself.

Anytime my cock was removed from the CB-3000 (for cleaning or sexual stimulation at the end of a lock up period) the keyholder is required to bind me in a manner whereas I will not be able to touch my cock with my own hands. There was one nasty clause in the contract that a prostate milking would constitute an orgasm.  While I've experienced prostate milkings before on a limited basis, by no means are they as sexually satisfying as a full orgasm.  But this was my keyholder's requirement, and it was him that I served, so I agreed.

Interestingly, I was completely at peace with this whole contract thing.  I knew my role and my keyholder would be the recipient of my sexual urges and desires rather than me handling things on my own.  This not only was sexually stimulating but it carried with it a certain concious desire to focus my attention on my keyholder and not myself. 

The first card was drawn on September 25th, 2007 and the card was an Eight of Clubs.  Eight days was to be my first locked period without an orgasm.

Posted by GayNLocked on September 30, 2007 06:19:00 | Permalink | Comments

September 10, 2007 is a very important day as it marks the first day of ownership of a CB-3000 chastity device.  We had been waiting rather anxiosly for it to arrive to begin the fitting.  My man sent me one of the most fabulous arrangement of flowers in recognition of the event and I was stunned to see them appear at the door only 5 minutes before UPS delivered the long awaited package.  He is such a wonderful man, I knew I was making the right decision in asking him to help me fulfill a much needed role in my life as his submissive chaste partner.

The next two weeks were nearly a disaster.  As I went through the process of fitting the device I experienced burning pain around the ring area of the device and was literally unable to leave the CB-3000 attached for more than a couple of hours.  I couldn't figure out the problem, a larger ring, I could pull out, using the points of interest cause pain all the time, was the shaved area of my cock and balls a problem, was it the lube used to get the device on, we must have tried everything.  I was, to say the very least, completely frustrated.

One day I tried something different.  I put the larger ring (of which I could escape) on.  I left the device in place for nearly the whole day without an issues of burning around the ring area and finally realized that the problem all along was the ring size.  I went to the store and purchased some felt tape (the kind used to put under furniture when sitting on hard wood floors and I attached a piece of that tape to the points of interest.  After working with it a while, I found that the felt actually pushed down enough on my cock to keep it from slipping out when the device was in place.  Wow! Satisfaction, I have now have a device that is bearable (don't let it fool you, it's not comfortable), and I can wear it for long terms.

Posted by GayNLocked on September 29, 2007 22:12:00 | Permalink | Comments

I have known I was gay since the age of 16.  I didn't necessarily want to admit it to myself or anyone else at the time, but I knew.  It wasn't until I was 46 and had one straight marriage under my belt that I realized that I was kidding nobody, especially myself.  On October 17, 2006 I fell head over heals in love with my husband-to-be.  

As our love grew and as we decided to live our lives as a couple, I introduced to him my desires to be a chaste, submissive man to him.  The main reason for my decision to be chaste was a rather frequent desire to play with myself and masturbate.  It wasn't until recently that I realized that I was quite literaly taking something away from our sex life by doing so when away from him.  Don't get me wrong, our sex life was fantastic!  I have never been so fulfilled, but I realized I was stealing away something that rightfully belonged to him.  I approached him one evening with an interst in a chastity device and a discussion of the Dominant/submissive (D/s) lifestyle.  I had researched D/s as well as Master/slave (M/s) years prior, and I knew that I desired to be the submissive in a gay relationship.

After several discussions with my partner, we decided that I should purchase a CB-3000 chastity device and we would begin exploring the lifestyle of D/s together and he would be my partner, lover, husband and finally, keyholder.  I was elated.  I wasn't sure how much enjoyment he would get from the lifestyle, but I wanted to try and see if this was something that could just add the final touch to our fabulous relationshiip.   

So, the entries you are about to read (as I write them), revolve around this lifestyle change we have made.  It might be a short blog, but then again, it might not.  Whatever the result, I intend to document it here as best I can, for anyone who has an interest to read.

Posted by GayNLocked on September 29, 2007 22:04:00 | Permalink | Comments